Pearl of Wisdom Number 21 - Building resilience

From an early age we learn all about adversity, and experience all kinds of challenges that affect our ability to keep moving forward. One of the biggest, most powerful life skills we can build in ourselves is resilience — but what if you haven't learnt how to build this over the years?

I was someone who didn't quite learn the art of resilience as a child, I flapped and flustered over difficult situations. I became embarrassed easily and would break may heart over things going wrong, or being wrong, or just simply experiencing the negative side of life. 

I definitely let my worried, sensitive mind hold me back from being my true self and achieving what mattered to me, and I often missed out on events and experiences that could have been so amazing for me because of fear and self loathing.

Does this sound familiar to you?

Sometimes building resilience means stepping out of your comfort zone and changing your habits, your mindset and your way of reacting to life — that's really difficult right?

The older we get, it seems we are more stuck in our ways and unwilling to step out of our comfort zone, making changes takes a lot of energy and will power so how can we start to build resilience when we've spent most of our lives resisting it, and why should we be focusing on it anyway when most of the time it's easier and feels more comfortable to take a step back and avoid any situation that we know will upset us or hold us back?

Well, this is where we should all get honest with ourselves and truly think about the life we want. I'm not talking about dream houses, fast cars, endless holidays and wardrobe of designer clothes! I'm talking about living a life that feels authentic and empowering to you and that version of your life will look different from the next persons.

I'm talking about the times when you fail and wish you'd tried again, I'm talking about the times when you wished you had spoken up for yourself instead letting others dictate to you, I'm taking about the times when you are hands down wrong and hide yourself away because those negative feelings are too consuming, I'm talking about your self esteem and your self worth, I'm talking about following a path that lines up with what you want and value in life and being brave enough to do so no matter what gets thrown at you.

It all starts with resilience.

It really is something thats worth investing in and the best thing you can do for yourself. It will change how you take that next step forward or how you handle that next crisis that comes your way. It will leave you feeling determined, empowered and confident and it will inspire others around you to build on theirs too.

So do you want to feel more like this? Is it time you paid some attention to your own resilience?

There are so many ways to build it too, from easy, simple tricks that you can weave into your everyday life like a mantra, to grand, epic gestures of facing your fears and changing your mindset, like holding a spider if you have a phobia of them. 

It's also easier when you get other people on board to support you, this could be anything from asking a loved one to support you to spending time with someone who has a massive amount of resilience and then some! Often learning from and being inspired by other gives us that motivation to make a change.

Remember that building your resilience is like a jigsaw puzzle, piece by piece, one a bit at a time will eventually build up to the bigger picture, there is no rush, just getting started and focusing in each section of life is all you need to see it grow and take shape.

So where can you start?

What will you do today to build a little bit more resilience into your life?

After all we only get one go at this life and who wants to spend it living in the shadows?!

Building and investing in my resilience levels was the best thing I ever did for myself and sees me constantly feeling more at ease with my life and more positive about the hurdles I need jump over, it gives me reassurance that I will keep bouncing back and not let the bad shit get the better of me!

It's a working progress, and I'm always building on it but it's definitely worth the investment in myself!

I'd love to know more about how you are building your resilience, leave a little comment below and let me know how you're getting on!