Whilst in the depths of suffering from shingles, and a week before Christmas just gone, my husband and I decided to make the crazy, spontaneous decision of getting our family a puppy...
It started off as a normal Saturday, Dave took our middle child to swimming lessons, I got up with the other two kids, put on a load of laundry, drank several cups of coffee and tried not to itch the clusters of pox that were coming out on the right side of my back. But by mid morning we were toying with the idea of a puppy after Dave randomly came across a for sale ad online for puppies just down the road from us.
After much begging from the kids and a few text conversations with the owners later we were pulling out of our drive and on our way to meet him, and by 2pm we were dog owners and on our way home again with a scared, barking pup and our kids crying in the back seat because they didn’t like the noise.
That night, and for next two weeks to follow, my husband slept downstairs to comfort him and let him out for toilet breaks and we binged watched puppy training videos on You Tube, spent a ton of money on puppy food, toys and equipment.
It very quickly dawned on us that, despite Dave growing up with dogs, we were completely unprepared for the chaos and attention that having a new puppy brings. We also realised that the following weekend was indeed Christmas, and we had to now figure that out with a new bouncy and excitable member of the family who liked to chew anything he got his teeth on.
Needless to say our Christmas and New Year celebrations were filled with lots of doggy fun peppered with some “What the hell have we done?!” moments too.
He’s now 14 weeks old, is much bigger and bouncier, but has become such a beloved member of the family and spending the last 5 weeks with our new pup has also reminded me of a few important lessons...
It’s OK to regret your decisions.
This goes for especially when you thought you were making a good one. Yes, that’s right, two days after we made the rash, spur of the moment decision to get our puppy I was flooded with feelings of regret. It was harder still because I knew some of the people we had told over the last few days about getting him thought we were a bit silly, so I had their voices in my head saying “I told you so!”.
So how did I manage that feeling? Well, I knew it was a decision I couldn’t take back so instead of languishing in the regret I decided to own it. Yes, we didn’t think it through but we could make the best of it and so we did. Like I said we read and learnt everything we could to be good dog owners and with Dave’s hindsight in having dogs before he was able to reassure me that the chaos of the puppy days don’t last forever and to be honest he’s constantly changing already.
The lesson for me here was to really throw myself into living with the decision, acknowledge my feelings and plan forward so I could see how the situation would change and evolve, the regret I felt now was temporary because life keeps changing. It was a good way to shift my mindset and leads on nicely to my next lesson.
Everything is temporary, good or bad.
As I said, the first few crazy weeks were temporary but felt hard at the time. We were lucky because pup had had his first vaccination before we took him home so we only had to wait a few weeks to get his next and then be able to take him out but my goodness he was a handful in the mean time. There’s a reason people look at you like you’re mad when you tell them you've got a boarder collie because they are full of energy that knows no bounds. His home is in the kitchen and he comes out through the day to play, go into the garden and then to settle with us in the living room at night but he needed more than this after the first week of settling him in and it was hard for all of us. Plus getting him used to being on his own, leaving the house, toilet training, jumping and biting at the kids and the sleepless nights it honestly felt like we had a newborn all over again.
But like a baby, he’s changing really quickly and so is life with him at home. Dave was really adamant that we were going to have boundaries from the start and that’s really paid off. He’s not allowed upstairs or on the sofa, we taught him to sit, lie down and make in the garden all within a few days and his nipping and biting has really calmed down. He still jumps up but he’s just very excited to see people and now that he can have his 3 walks a day (yes he does because we both work from home and that’s why we’re actually perfect pup people!), he sleeeeeeps so much now!
The lesson here is to lean into the hard bits, take the small wins and trust that your situation won’t always feel like this. A good way to remember this is to look back at something in your past that felt hard or uncomfortable and recongnise that your situation changed, your feelings changed and life changed. It’s a nice nudge to try to celebrate the good stuff also because unfortunately life can be shit times too.
Change is good for the soul.
I’ve talked about change so many times in past blog posts but here’s a doggy spin on it. So if you haven’t realised by now our pup has created a lot of change in our life these last month, again we didn’t really anticipate how much, but I can honestly say it’s been for the best. We’ve had to completely change our morning routine, especially since he’s been going out for walks and he’s made my husband a morning person which is something i’ve been trying to and failing at for years!
We’ve had to rethink our trips out and our plan to go away for our wedding anniversary this year but instead I’ve been researching dog-friendly cottages and get aways and found some gorgeous places. As I’ve already mentioned he now allowed to go out for walks and although my husband does it 100% at the moment it’s been a good change to his routine and we’ve all joined him at various times through the week and I’m for one loving the extra excuse to get my steps in.
The lesson is that although change can feel overwhelming, strange and annoying even, it can bring about news perspectives, encourage new, positive habits and if you’re lucky present you with better circumstances in the long run.
In weeks we’ve had him so many have said to me that getting a dog was the best thing they’ve done for their family and I couldn’t agree more but I must confess I am not a dog person so this has been a massive step for me and I’ve had to really take some time to get used to it. I think he may truly be the only dog I love but that’s enough, that’s all he needs from me and he’s all I need too.
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